Really Funny Clean Jokes and Humor

2NITE
Tonight

4ever
Forever

4-F-R N F-R
Forever and Ever

AAF
As A Friend

AAMOF
As A Matter Of Fact

AAMOI
As A Matter Of Interest

AAR
At Any Rate

AAR8
At Any Rate

AAYF
As Always, Your Friend

ABITHIWTIDB
A bird In The Hand Is Worth Two In The Bush

ABT2
About To

ACK
Acknowledgement

ADAD
Another Day Another Dollar

ADBB
All Done Bye Bye

ADR
Address

AEAP
As Early As Possible

AFAIC
As Far As I'm Concerned

AFAICS
As Far As I Can See

AFAICT
As far As I can Tell

AFAIK
As Far As I Know

AFAIU
As Far As I Understand

AFAIUI
As Far As I Understand It

AFAP
As Far As Possible

AFAYC
As Far As You're Concerned

AFC
Away From Computer

AFIAA
As Far As I Am Aware

AFK
Away From Keyboard

AFZ
Acronym free zone

AGKWE
And God Knows What Else

AIH
As It Happens

AIMB
As I Mentioned Before

AIMP
Always In My Prayers

AISE
As I Said Earlier

AISI
As I See It

AKA
Also Known As

ALAP
As Late As Possible

ALOL
Actually Laughing Out Loud

AMAP
As Many As Possible

AMBW
All My Best Wishes

AML
All My Love

AND
Any day now

ASAP
As Soon As Possible

ASL
Age/Sex/Location

ASLMH
Age/Sex/Location/Music/Hobbies

ATST
At The Same Time

ATW
Around the Web

AWOL
Absent Without Leave

AYK
As You Know

B/C
Because

B4
Before

B4N
Bye For Now

B4U
Before You

BAG
Bursting A Gut

BAK
Back At my Keyboard

BAU
Business As Usual

BB4N
Bye-Bye for Now

BBBG
Bye Bye Be Good

BBFN
Bye-Bye for Now

BBIAB
Be Back In A Bit

BBL
Be Back Later

BBN
Bye Bye Now

BBSL
Be Back Sooner or Later

BBT
Be Back Tomorrow

BCnU
Be Seein' You

BCOZ
Because

BFF
Best Friends Forever

BFN
Bye For Now

BFnDL
Big F***ing Deal

BKA
Better Known As

BRB
Be Right Back

BRT
Be Right There

BS
Big Smile

BSF
But Seriously, Folks

BTA
But Then Again

BTDT
Been There Done That

BTDTBTS
Been There, Done That, Bought The T-shirt

BTHOOM
Beats The Heck Out Of Me

BTW
By The Way

BW
Best Wishes

BWDIK
But What Do I Know?

BYKT
But you Knew That

C-A-D
Control Alt Delete

CB
Chat brat

CIAO
Goodbye (in Italian)

CID
Consider It Done

CMF
Count My Fingers

CMIW
Correct Me if I'm Wrong

COB
Close Of Business

C-P
Sleepy

CRAT
Can't Remember A Thing

CSL
Can't Stop Laughing

CU
See You

CUL
See You Later

CUL8ER
See You Later

CUL8R
See You Later

CUNS
See You In School!

CWYL
Chat With You Later

CY
Calm Yourself

CYL
See You Later

CYT
See You Tomorrow

DARFC
Ducking And Running For Cover

DBEYR
Don't Believe Everything You Read

DD
Due Diligence

DETI
Don't Even Think It

DF
Dear Friend

DGA
Don't Go Anywhere

DGT
Don't Go There

DGTG
Don't Go There Girlfriend

DHYB
Don't Hold Your Breath

DIKU
Do I Know You

DIY
Do It Yourself

DKDC
Don't Know Don't Care

DL
Download

DLTM
Don't Lie To Me

DMI
Don't Mention It

DNC
Does Not Compute

DQYDJ
Don't Quit Your Day Job

DRIB
Don't Read If Busy

DUST
Did You See That?

DWYM
Does What You Mean

DYJHIW
Don't You Just Hate it When...

DYJHIWTH
Don't You Just Hate it When That Happens

E123
Easy as One, Two, Three

EAK
Eating at Keyboard

EG
Evil Grin

EL
Evil Laugh

EOD
End Of Day

EOM
End Of Message

EULA
End-User License Agreement

EWI
E-mailing While Intoxicated

EZ
Easy

F2F
Face-to-Face

FAB
Features Attributes Benefits

FAQL
Frequently Asked Questions List

FAWC
For Anyone Who Cares

FBKS
Failure Between Keyboard and Seat

FE
Fatal Error

FF
Friends Forever

FIFO
First In, First Out

FISH
First in, Still Here

FITB
Fill in the Blanks

FO
Feck Off

FOAF
Friend Of A Friend

FOC
Free of Charge

FOFL
Falling on Floor Laughing

FTASB
Faster Than A Speeding Bullet

FTL
Faster Than Light

FTTB
For The Time Being

FUD
Fear, Uncertainty, and Disinformation

FWD
Forward

FWIW
For What It's Worth

FYA
For Your Amusement

FYI
For Your Information

FYMI
For Your Misinformation

GA
Go Ahead

GAL
Get A Life

GAMMD
Go Ahead Make My Day

GBH
Great Big Hug

GGN
Gotta Go Now

GIGO
Garbage In, Garbage Out

GIWIST
Gee, I Wish I'd Said That

GL
Good Luck

GMTA
Great Minds Think Alike

GMTFT
Great Minds Think For Themselves

GNBLFY
Got Nothing But Love For You

GR&D
Grinning Running And Ducking

GR8
Great

GRRRR
it means Growling

GTG
Got To Go

GTGB
Got To Go, Bye

GTH
Go To Hell

GTSY
Glad To See Ya

HAGD
Have a Great Day

HAGO
Have A Good One

HAK
Hugs And Kisses

HAND
Have a Nice Day

HB
Hurry Back

HD
Hold

HF
Hello, Friend

HHO1/2K
Ha Ha, Only Half Kidding

HHOJ
Ha-Ha, Only Joking

HHOK
Ha Ha, Only Kidding

HHOS
Ha-Ha, Only Being Serious

HHTYAY
Happy Holidays To You And Yours

HIH
Hope It Helps

HIOOC
Help! I'm Out Of Coffee

HTH
Hope This (or That) Helps

HUA
Heads Up Ace

HUGZ
Hugs

I 1-D-R
I Wonder

IAC
In Any Case

IAE
In Any Event

IAITS
It's All In The Subject

IANAE
I Am Not an Expert

IAT
I Am Tired

IBRB
I Will Be Right Back

IBT
In Between Technology

IBTD
I Beg To Differ

IC
In Character

ICBW
I Could Be Wrong

ID10T
Idiot

IDGAD
I Don't Give A Damn

IDGI
I Don't Get It

IDK
I Don't Know

IDKY
I Don't Know You

I-D-L
Ideal

IDM
It Does Not Matter

IDST
I Didn't Say That

IDTS
I Don't Think So

IEF
It's Esther's Fault

IFAB
I Found A Bug

IGGP
I Gotta Go Pee

IGTP
I Get The Point

IHAIM
I Have Another Instant Message

IHNO
I Have No Opinion

IIIO
Intel Inside, Idiot Outside

IIMAD
If It Makes An(y) Difference

IIR
If I Recall

IIRC
If I Remember Correctly

IIWM
If It Were Me

ILU
I Love You

ILY
I Love You

IM
Instant Messaging

IMHO
In My Humble Opinion

IMO
In My Opinion

IMS
I Am Sorry

IMU
I Mucked Up

INMP
It's Not My Problem

INPO
In No Particular Order

IOH
I'm Outta Here

IOW
In Other Words

IRL
In Real Life

ISS
I Said So

ISTM
It Seems to Me

ISTR
I Seem To Remember

ISWYM
I See What You Mean

ITM
In The Money

IUM
If You Must

IYKWIM
If You Know What I Mean

IYO
In Your Opinion

IYSS
If You Say So

IYSWIM
If You See What I Mean

J/C
Just Checking

J/K
Just Kidding!

J/W
Just Wondering

JAD
Just Another day

JAM
Just a Minute

JK
Just Kidding

JM2C
Just My 2 Cents

JOOTT
Just One Of Those Things

JT
Just Teasing

€K
You're OK

K
Okay

KBD
Keyboard

KEWL
Cool

KFY
Kiss For You

KIR
Keep It Real

KISS
Keep It Simple Stupid

KIT
Keep In Touch

KMA
Kiss My Ass

KMRIA
Kiss My Royal Irish Arse

KOK
Knock

KOTC
Kiss On The Cheek

KOTL
Kiss On The Lips

KWIM
Know What I Mean

L8R
Later

LAQ
Lame Ass Quote

LD
Long Distance

LIFO
Last In First Out

LLTA
Lots And Lots Of Thunderous Applause

LMAO
Laughing My Ass Off

LMK
Let Me Know

LOL
Lots of Love

LOL
Laughing Out Loud

LOLA
Laugh Out Loud Again

LOOL
Laughing Outragously Out Loud

LRF
Little Rubber Feet

LTIC
Laughing 'Til I Cry

LTNS
Long Time No See

LWR
Launch When Ready

LYL
Love Ya Lots

LYLAB
Love You Like a Brother

LYLAS
Love You Like A Sister

M8
Mate

MFD
Multi-Function Device

MfG
Mit freundlichen Gruessen

MHBFY
My Heart Bleeds For You

MHOTY
My Hat's Off To You

MIHAP
May I Have Your Attention Please

MKOP
My Kind Of Place

MM
Market Maker

MMHA2U
My Most Humble Apologies To You

MOMPL
One Moment Please

MOO
Mud, Object-Oriented

MOOS
Member Of The Opposite Sex

MorF
Male or Female?

MOTD
Message Of The Day

MSG
Message

MTBF
Mean Time Between Failure

MTFBWY
May The Force Be With You

MUBAR
Messed up Beyond All Recognition

MWBRL
More Will Be Revealed Later

MYOB
Mind Your Own Business

N/A
Not Applicable

N/T
No Text

N1
Nice One

N2M
Not To Mention

NAK
Nursing At Keyboard

NALOPKT
Not A Lot of People Know That

N-A-Y-L
In A While

NAZ
Name, Address, Zip Code

NBD
No Big Deal

NBIF
No Basis In Fact

NCG
New College Graduate

N-E-1
Anyone

N-E-1 ER
Anyone Here?

NG
New Game

NIFOC
Nude In Front Of The Computer

NIM
No Internal Message

NIMBY
Not In My Back Yard

NIMQ
Not In My Queue

NM
Never Mind

NMP
Not My Problem

NOYB
None Of Your Business

NP
No Problem

NQOCD
Not Quite Our Class Dear

NRG
Energy

NRN
No Reply Necessary

NTK
Nice To Know

NTYMI
Now That You Mention It

NUFF
Enough Said

NW
No Way!

NYCFS
New York City Finger Saluet

OAUS
On An Unrelated Subject

OBTW
Oh By The Way

OEM
Original Equipment Manufacturer

OIC
Oh, I see

OK
All Correct

OLL
On-Line Love

OMDB
Over My Dead Body

OMG
Oh My Gosh

OMIK
Open Mouth, Insert Keyboard

ONNA
Oh No, Not Again

ONNTA
Oh No, Not This Again

OOC
Out Of Character

OOF
Out Of Facility

OOI
Out Of Interest

OOO
Out Of Office

OOTB
Out Of The Box

OOTB
Out Of The Blue

OOTC
Obligatory On Topic Comment

OS
Operating System

OT
Off Topic

OTOH
On the Other Hand

OTP
On the Phone

OTT
Over the Top

OTTOMH
Off the Top of my Head

OUSU
Oh, You Shut Up

OWTTE
Or Words To That Effect

OZ
Australia

PANS
Pretty Awesome New Stuff

PD
Public Domain

PDOMA
Pulled Directly Out Of My Ass

PDQ
Pretty Darn Quick

PEBCAK
Problem Exists Between Chair And Keyboard

PIMP
Peeing In My Pants

PITA
Pain In The Ass

PLS
Please

PM
Personal Message

PMFJI
Pardon Me For Jumping In

PMJI
Pardon My Jumping In

PO
Piss Off

PONA
Person Of No Account

POOF
Good-bye

POS
Parent Over Shoulder

POV
Point of View

PS
Post Script

PU
That Stinks

P-ZA
Pizza

QL
Quit Laughing!

QS
Quit Scrolling

QT
Cutie

R&D
Research & Development

R&R
Rest & Relaxation

RBAY
Right Back At Ya

RBTL
Read Between The Lines

RE
Regards (or Reference)

RFD
Request For Discussion

RKBA
Right to Keep and Bear Arms

RL
Real Life

RLF
Real Life Friend

RMLB
Read My Lips Baby

RMMM
Read My Mail Man!

RN
Right Now!

ROFL
Rolling on the Floor Laughing

ROTFL
Rolling On The Floor Laughing

ROTFLOL
Rolling On The Floor Laughing Out Loud

ROTM
Right On The Money

RSN
Real Soon Now

RTBS
Reason To Be Single

RTFAQ
Read the FAQ File

RTFM
Read The F**king Manual

RTK
Return To Keyboard

RTM
Read The Manual

RU
Are You?

RUMORF
Are You Male Or Female

RUOK
Are you Okay?

RUUP4IT
Are You Up For It

RX
Regards

RYO
Roll Your Own

S2R
Send To Receive

S4L
Spam For Life

SBT
Sleeping, Bored, Tired

SBTA
Sorry, Being Thick Again

SCNR
Sorry, Could Not Resist

SED
Said Enough Darling

SF
Surfer Friendly

SF
Science Fiction

SFAIAA
So Far As I Am Aware

SFETE
Smiling From Ear To Ear

SH
Sh** Happens

SITD
Still In The Dark

SLIRK
Smart Little Rich Kid

SMAIM
Send Me An Instant Message

SME
Subject Matter Expert

SMEM
Send Me E-Mail

SNAG
Sensitive New Age Guy

SNERT
Snotty Nosed Egotistical Rotten Teenager

SO
Significant Other

SOHF
Sense Of Humor Failure

SOP
Standard Operating Procedure

SorG
Straight or Gay?

SRO
Standing Room Only

SSDD
Same Sh** Different Day

SSEWBA
Someday Soon, Everything Will Be Acronyms

STFU
Shut The F*** Up

STR8
Straight

STYS
Speak To You Soon

SUYF
Shut Up You Fool

SWAG
Scientific Wild Ass Guess

SWAK
Sealed With A Kiss

SWALK
Sealed With A Loving Kiss

SWDYT
So What Do You Think?

SYS
See You Soon

TAFN
That Is All for Now

TAH
Take A Hike

TBA
To Be Advised

TBC
To Be Continued

TCB
The Trouble Came Back!

TDTM
Talk Dirty To Me

TFDS
That is For Darn Sure

TFH
Thread From Hell

TFN
Thanks For Nothing

TGIF
Thank God it Is Friday

THX
Thanks

TIA
Thanks In Advance

TIAIL
Think I Am In Love

TIC
Tongue In Cheek

TKS
Thanks

TLA
Three Letter Acronym

TLGO
The List Goes On

TLK-2-U-L-8-R
Talk to You Later

TM
Trust Me

TMI
Too Much Information

TNA
Temporarily Not Available

TNC
Tongue In Cheek

TNX
Thanks

TOM
Tomorrow

TOT
Tons of Time

TPC
The Phone Company

TPTB
The Powers That Be

TSR
Totally Stuck in RAM

TTFN
Ta Ta For Now

TTG
Time to Go

TTS
Text to Speech

TTT
That's The Ticket

TTUL
Talk to You Later

TTYL
Talk To You Later

TVN
Thank You Very Much

TWHAB
This Won't Hurt A Bit

TWIMC
To Whom it may Concern

TXS
Thanks

TY
Thank You

TYVM
Thank You Very Much

U
You

U2
You Too?

U-L
You Will

unPC
unPolitically Correct

U-R
You Are

U-R W-S
You Are Wise

URYY4M
You Are Too Wise For Me

VBG
Very Big Grin

VBS
Very Big Smile

VC
Venture Capital

VEG
Very Evil Grin

VFM
Value For Money

VM
Voice Mail

VSF
Very Sad Face

W/O
Without

WAD
Without A Doubt

WAG
Wild Ass Guess

WAI
What An Idiot

WB
Write Back

WBS
Write Back Soon

WC
Who Cares?

WCA
Who Cares Anyway

WDYS
What Did You Say?

WDYT
What Do You Think?

WE
Whatever

WEG
Wicked Evil Grin

WF
Way Fun

WFM
Works For Me

WG
Wicked Grin

WIIFM
What's In It For Me?

WISP
Winning Is So Pleasureable

WNOHGB
Were No One Has Gone Before

WOG
Wise Old Guy

WT
Without Thinking

WTB
Want To Buy

WTF
What The F***

WTG
Way To Go!

WTH
What the Heck

WTTM
Without Thinking To Much

WU?
What is Up

WUF?
Where are You From?

WWY?
Where Were You?

WYCM?
Will You Call Me?

WYP
What's Your Problem?

WYRN
What's Your Real Name?

WYS
Whatever You Say

WYSIWYG
What You See Is What You Get

WYSLPG
What You See Looks Pretty Good

WYT
Whatever You Think

WYWH
Wish You Were Here

X-I-10
Exciting

XME
Excuuuuse Me

XOXO
Hugs and Kisses

YA
Yet Another

YAFIYGI
You Asked For It You Got It

YCT
Your Comment To

YDKM
You Don't Know Me

YGBK
You Gotta Be Kiddin'

YHM
You have mail

YKW?
You Know What?

YNK
You Never Know

YOYO
You're On Your Own

YTTT
You Telling The Truth?

YW
You are Welcome

YWIA
You're Welcome In Advance

YYSSW
Yeah Yeah Sure Sure Whatever

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