How to keep my wife happy.

101 (Small) Things To Keep The Wife Happy

1. Give her a hug every day

2. Say "I Love You" at the end of every phone conversation

3. Remember to take out the garbage

4. Take the kids for a walk (or drive). Alone time does wonders for refreshment.

5. Make her her favorite drink (whether it be coffee, tea, soda, or martini)

6. Ask about her day

7. Make dinner every now and again (or bring home take out without being asked)

8. Record her favorite television shows (or get Season Passes to them on TiVo)

9. Paint her toe nails (or fingers. She might have a preference)

10. Let her win an argument (or seven)

11. Pick up your dirty laundry off the floor

12. Play footsie in bed

13. Snuggle

14. Offer to help her carry the groceries

15. Give her a weekend to herself

16. Bring home unexpected small gifts

17. Comment on her new hair cut

18. Bring her tissues when she's sick

19. Offer to watch the movie of her choice

20. Clean the kitchen

21. Spend a weekend away (again, this time she gets the house to herself)

22. Call during the day just to say Hi

23. Hold her hand when your out and about (that is, if you can get it away from the children)

24. Smile the first time you see her each day.

25. Fold a load of laundry. Or start a new load in the washer. Or do both.

26. Trust that she knows where to go for the party next weekend (got and printed the directions).

27. Listen when she's trying to tell you she's upset

28. Let her take an afternoon nap

29. Pick up milk on the way home (or whatever grocery item is always "empty")

30. Offer to wash her car

31. Bring home a favorite flower (or bouquet)

32. Take out some favorite photos of the both of you and reminisce

33. Give her a back rub (or massage her feet. Or shoulders. Or really, whatever she likes)

34. Let her sleep in this Saturday

35. And then make her favorite breakfast (or go out to a restaurant for it)

36. Ask about one of her biggest wishes or dreams

37. Leave a love note in her purse/car/wallet

38. Buy a coffee shop gift card (if that's her thing) and leave it for her in the morning

39. If you empty the toilet paper roll, get and place the new one

40. Windex the bathroom mirror

41. Take they dry cleaning in

42. Never underestimate the power of a good night kiss

43. Clean off the dinner table dishes

44. Ask her to go for a walk with you

45. Talk to each other... have a conversation about something meaningful or nothing in particular

46. Put the kids to bed

47. Hang that picture/shelf/candle holder you always meant to

48. Bring home a gift certificate for a pedicure or massage

49. Fill her car up with gas (and wash the windshield)

50. Hershey Chocolate Kisses (get creative)

51. Zip up or button the back of her dress or shirt

52. Gently place a blanket over her if she falls asleep in the afternoon or on the couch in the evening

53. Go to the pharmacy for her medication when she's sick

54. Bathe the kids

55. Buy her "girlie" shampoo, conditioner, and soap for the shower

56. Make dinner reservations (complete with arrangements for a baby sitter)

57. Don't complain if she's having one of those long phone conversations

58. Offer to clean up her computer screen and/or keyboard

59. Take a picture of her favorite place and send it to her (or leave it in a card on the table)

60. Whisper sweet nothings into her ear

61. Feed the pets

62. Run her a bubble bath. With candles.

63. Offer her your jacket if it is cold.

64. Rub lotion on her hands (and hell anywhere else you want)

65. Give her space when she needs it

66. Ask about her work (and yes, if she stays home--ask about the children, the housework, etc)

67. Make a mix tape (or playlist)

68. Send funny e-mails. Either share a funny remark, send love notes, or even URLs for the funniest videos you've ever seen. It just means you are thinking of her. And she of you.

69. Shut the door sometimes when you are in the restroom

70. Hang up your coat after you come in (and the shoes, put them away too)

71. Warm and pull up the car to the restaurant/store door if it is cold or raining or windy

72. Buy her earrings. Or a necklace. A ring. Something inexpensive, but fun/beautiful/reminiscent of you

73. Let her cry if she needs to

74. Help get that item off the "high shelf"

75. Rub her back as you pass by her cooking dinner (or reading e-mail. It is the touch that counts)

76. Clean up the clutter in the living room/kitchen/bathroom--any room. Just spruce it up tonight. She'll notice

77. Come home early

78. Offer to cook her dinner (not on the grill. In the kitchen please)

79. Pull out the wedding glasses and toast to your "togetherness"

80. Sit next to her on the couch

81. Look her in the eye and tell her how you feel about her

82. Look up her Favorites or Wish Lists at an online store... and buy her something small from the list

83. Take charge for the evening--corralling the children for bedtime, bathing, reading, television, etc.

84. Ask her what one small thing you could do to make her life easier at that moment and do it

85. Offer to paint a room the color of her choice

86. Give up the television remote for one night

87. Pack her lunch for the day

88. Call her favorite girlfriend to schedule a surprise her with a girls' night/day out and about

89. Bake her a cake/pie/muffin/favorite dessert

90. Remember a special moment you had together, talk about it, discuss it, and share it with her (this can just be done verbally, in a letter... anything that you want to do)

91. Tell her when she looks good. As in, "Hey, you look great in that." Or if she is wearing your favorite perfume, mention it.

92. Fluff her pillow before bed

93. Next time you are at a party or social gathering--give her wink from across the room. Or a knowing glance. Or a grin. Some sort of shared thought or expression that the two of you can share

94. Find out how she likes her eggs and/or coffee. This can be valuable information.

95. Clean the toilet(s)

96. Take her picture when you think she looks beautiful. Even if she doesn't want you to.

97. Open the car/restaurant/store door for her

98. Let her pick the music in the car next time your driving together

99. Remind her why you married her.

100. Find a way to make her laugh. Really laugh. It does wonders for the soul.

101. Tell her you love her. And mean it.

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My wife would get

My wife would get extraordinarily suspicious if I did all that.. I find an occasional well-aimed punch keeps her in line.

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